PHEROMONES | LOGIC

P H E R O M O N E S

     So I was lounging in bed on a nice weekend morning when this thought occurred to me, how do we choose the guys we sleep with? Was it a hormonal response or some logical decision?

     We live in a world where sex has become as casual as shopping for a new purse. You could meet literally anyone anywhere and hit it off. So how are we able to weed the bad from the good?

     I had just started seeing this guy, we’ll call him Cinderman, and he seemed perfect. Ahh yes of course, that should have been the first sign, too good to be true. But however, against my better judgment I allowed myself to explore Cinderman. Thing about this guy was, he was a big talker, talk talk talk but not much action. Yet I chucked it up to maybe its too soon to expect anything. We’d slept together but we hadn’t been on an actual date. It had been two weeks and yet he didn’t seem in too much of a hurry to actually take his big talk out of the bedroom.

Now, from a saner point of view, a person would say “dead it”. But, I figured in my head that maybe I could be serious with Cinderman, honestly hoping to God I was making a good decision to be patient. Thought behind it was, yes we’d had sex and now gotten that out of the way. Yes I found him attractive but it wasn’t what blinded me to his huge flaw, it was his charisma I later realized was the “hook, line and sinker” of his act. He was someone I thought I had chosen correctly to build something with, but I was wrong. Was it me? Or was it some sick hormonal trick? Did I choose wrong? And is there ever any assurance that you’ve made the right choice?

There were so many things wrong with this picture that I refused to see. He’d say one thing and act another way. A perfect example was how he’d make a big deal out of not being shallow then the next minute he’s humble bragging about a possession. I mean the man was literally full of air, it was a surprise his head never floated away. I did enjoy his company sometimes I think. In the end I found myself hurt and disappointed. If truly, we can’t help the kind of people we fall for and it just comes down to hormonal responses which sometimes cloud our better judgment, are we even making the decision consciously? And if not then it honestly begs the question, what’s the point? And can we blame bad choices on science?