SMILE

Smile

It’s getting harder to smile, to be the sun. There’s an eclipse and I feel it enclosing me. I’ve never felt farther from myself, my truth – from life. I want to look to you for hope but you’re relentless. You tear at my flesh and pick me apart. I’m searching, lost in my thoughts and lost in your endless eclipse. Your shadow seems too big and I feel myself shrink even smaller. How do I undo this night? I am fighting you with the wrong tools, where are the books to learn your weaknesses? How do I conquer this foe?

You portray yourself as a raging storm on an angry night. Calm yourself, whisper, your voice is too loud and I can’t make out your words. Your anger is piercing, causing more damage to my peace. You hate me. Every cloud you have created hangs heavy over me, I can’t move. I break down in little bits, blowing away in your notorious winds. I need help. Somebody save me from the monster within. Clawing your way out with your teeth, jaws wide and ready. I’m dying you’re killing me.

Tartarean and hungry, you gnaw on my bones and innocence. You want to snuff out any hope of revival and leave me desolate – bare. Your unpredictable nature, tortuous yet wicked. Set me free from your grasp, I want to be free and live in my naivety. Stop spilling your truths on me you do not define me. I will not become that person. I will not become that person. I will not become that person. I will not become that person. I will not become that person. Leave me alone.